of rules.

So what do we do?

The first step in successfully blending work vs. life balance is to define culturally loaded statements that cause judgment and resentment. For example, what is "a sense of urgency" or "a good work ethic"? Different cultures define these terms according to their own values and priorities. Each side can discuss how they view these concepts as objectively as possible to increase understanding, thus moving away from the "lazy vs. hardworking" mentality.

The second step for success is to identify the areas of flexibili

I got married just shy of two weeks ago in Roswell, Georgia. The wedding and its surrounding events were the best days of my life, filled with a million sparks of light, love and warmth.

The problem is, well I'm having trouble going back to work.

I love my job to the core, but after weeks of being surrounded by family and friends, assembling centerpieces and just being, I'm struggling with sitting at my desk and caring about e-mail. I long to return to the land of happy wedding bliss, dancing around a proverbial Maypole and hanging out on the couch with a dear friend.

Eventually I got back to work and did as much as I could. But after a few hours I daydreamed, tried to fight it off, gave up and ended up on the sofa watching Everybody Loves Raymond. To make matters worse (and here's the cultural stuff for those who were wondering) I berated myself for being lazy.

"You should be doing more!" I told myself. "Think of how much you could be achieving. Get back to work! Volunteer more! Write more articles! NOW!"

This tirade went on for awhile until my professional training kicked in. I flashed back to living in Nepal for a year. I saw Nepalis closing up their shops to drink tea with neighbors; I saw how sitting by the lake chatting with family did not diminish them; I saw how being with each other improved their quality of life.

In Nepal, the amount you achieve does not equal how worthy you are as a human being. Perception of achievement is partly cultural. What a relief.

All over the world, work and quality of life get balanced in different proportions. This happens even within your own culture (think of the man or woman whose children come before working overtime, even in a work crisis). Challenges can arise when two cultures come together from opposite ends of the spectrum.

For example, a recent U.S. client of mine acquired a company in the U.K. The biggest source of frustration for both was the gap in work vs. life balance. The U.S. side believed in 24/7, Blackberries on vacation, and weekend work. U.K. employees often left right at 5:00 pm, refused to work weekends and resented their new U.S. headquarters for infringing on personal time. Neither side saw the logic of the other's set of rules.

So what do we do?

The first step in successfully blending work vs. life balance is to define culturally loaded statements that cause judgment and resentment. For example, what is "a sense of urgency" or "a good work ethic"? Different cultures define these terms according to their own values and priorities. Each side can discuss how they view these concepts as objectively as possible to increase understanding, thus moving away from the "lazy vs. hardworking" mentality.

The second step for success is to identify the areas of flexibilit

with a dear friend.

Eventually I got back to work and did as much as I could. But after a few hours I daydreamed, tried to fight it off, gave up and ended up on the sofa watching Everybody Loves Raymond. To make matters worse (and here's the cultural stuff for those who were wondering) I berated myself for being lazy.

"You should be doing more!" I told myself. "Think of how much you could be achieving. Get back to work! Volunteer more! Write more articles! NOW!"

This tirade went on for awhile until my professional training kicked in. I flashed back to living in Nepal for a year. I saw Nepalis closing up their shops to drink tea with neighbors; I saw how sitting by the lake chatting with family did not diminish them; I saw how being with each other improved their quality of life.

In Nepal, the amount you achieve does not equal how worthy you are as a human being. Perception of achievement is partly cultural. What a relief.

All over the world, work and quality of life get balanced in different proportions. This happens even within your own culture (think of the man or woman whose children come before working overtime, even in a work crisis). Challenges can arise when two cultures come together from opposite ends of the spectrum.

For example, a recent U.S. client of mine acquired a company in the U.K. The biggest source of frustration for both was the gap in work vs. life balance. The U.S. side believed in 24/7, Blackberries on vacation, and weekend work. U.K. employees often left right at 5:00 pm, refused to work weekends and resented their new U.S. headquarters for infringing on personal time. Neither side saw the logic of the other's set of rules.

So what do we do?

The first step in successfully blending work vs. life balance is to define culturally loaded statements that cause judgment and resentment. For example, what is "a sense of urgency" or "a good work ethic"? Different cultures define these terms according to their own values and priorities. Each side can discuss how they view these concepts as objectively as possible to increase understanding, thus moving away from the "lazy vs. hardworking" mentality.

The second step for success is to identify the areas of flexibili

back to living in Nepal for a year. I saw Nepalis closing up their shops to drink tea with neighbors; I saw how sitting by the lake chatting with family did not diminish them; I saw how being with each other improved their quality of life.

In Nepal, the amount you achieve does not equal how worthy you are as a human being. Perception of achievement is partly cultural. What a relief.

All over the world, work and quality of life get balanced in different proportions. This happens even within your own culture (think of the man or woman whose children come before working overtime, even in a work crisis). Challenges can arise when two cultures come together from opposite ends of the spectrum.

For example, a recent U.S. client of mine acquired a company in the U.K. The biggest source of frustration for both was the gap in work vs. life balance. The U.S. side believed in 24/7, Blackberries on vacation, and weekend work. U.K. employees often left right at 5:00 pm, refused to work weekends and resented their new U.S. headquarters for infringing on personal time. Neither side saw the logic of the other's set of rules.

So what do we do?

The first step in successfully blending work vs. life balance is to define culturally loaded statements that cause judgment and resentment. For example, what is "a sense of urgency" or "a good work ethic"? Different cultures define these terms according to their own values and priorities. Each side can discuss how they view these concepts as objectively as possible to increase understanding, thus moving away from the "lazy vs. hardworking" mentality.

The second step for success is to identify the areas of flexibili

come before working overtime, even in a work crisis). Challenges can arise when two cultures come together from opposite ends of the spectrum.

For example, a recent U.S. client of mine acquired a company in the U.K. The biggest source of frustration for both was the gap in work vs. life balance. The U.S. side believed in 24/7, Blackberries on vacation, and weekend work. U.K. employees often left right at 5:00 pm, refused to work weekends and resented their new U.S. headquarters for infringing on personal time. Neither side saw the logic of the other's set of rules.

So what do we do?

The first step in successfully blending work vs. life balance is to define culturally loaded statements that cause judgment and resentment. For example, what is "a sense of urgency" or "a good work ethic"? Different cultures define these terms according to their own values and priorities. Each side can discuss how they view these concepts as objectively as possible to increase understanding, thus moving away from the "lazy vs. hardworking" mentality.

The second step for success is to identify the areas of flexibili

of rules.

So what do we do?

The first step in successfully blending work vs. life balance is to define culturally loaded statements that cause judgment and resentment. For example, what is "a sense of urgency" or "a good work ethic"? Different cultures define these terms according to their own values and priorities. Each side can discuss how they view these concepts as objectively as possible to increase understanding, thus moving away from the "lazy vs. hardworking" mentality.

The second step for success is to identify the areas of flexibility. Where can each side share the burden, compromise or change procedures? In the example above, the U.S. staff could learn to cross-train more thoroughly, provide better rationale for overtime and limit weekend work. The U.K. staff could learn to openly discuss their needs with management, offer more flexibility and compromise when possible in crisis times.

The third step for success is to learn which elements of each culture could benefit the whole. For example, people in the U.S. often wonder how European countries allow such long vacations (four to six weeks is standard). The answer is planning. Vacations are planned into the budget at the beginning of the year, as is rigorous cross-training. Aren't planning and cross-training elements that can help any organization? Looking at how cultures around the world do business, including balancing work and the rest of life helps elevate the whole organization.

There is no magic solution to work vs. life balance in a global setting, but recognition is a grand start. Ironically, when I recognized my high expectation of achievement as a cultural trait, I was able to relax, stop beating myself up and get back to work with a smile.

© Vicki Flier 2007 All Rights Reserved